i am born like that
does anyone believe me when i say that i am born pessimistic, that i am a true blue depression junkie and hardly anything cheers me up in my life? most people see me wearing a smile all day long, i wonder how long more before its worn off. a year has passed, vietnam n india after 2 mundane years in army is not just a refreshing breeze. it has been one typhoon of a ride... every single rotting cell in me received blasts of invigorating energy which sets the pace for facing up to the challenges this year.
things aren't starting on the right note, friends face calamities from time to time. triangle is a very complicated thing. someone gets hurt someone gets lucky nobody comes out unscathed.
nothing stays the same. the ghosts of unforgiveness shrieks, bad blood showers..
personally, i am still vexed. she can't tell what she feels abt me. that's driving me insanely towards a cliff with a nice creek for infinite vertigo. its just so difficult to maintain a nonchalant mood when i am ard her. may even appear as a slave to her. at her beck n call. its fine if things are done in a old fashion manner. let there be confirmation. who am i kiddin? MYSELF!
breakfast was great, her companionship was great, am i just seeking cheap thrills? such are the things that affix a smile on me face. easy to please? i beg to differ.. its walking towards a knife with the end so sinewly sharp, not a single drop of blood smear when u push on. its called voluntary suicide. and its what i do.. ouch!
posted by ruffmeowz @ 2:50 AM
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